Just Try

How are you readers? How’s things? HAPPY THANKSGIVING WEEK!

Thankful pumpkin

Well, while most people are making sure that their most comfortable leggings are clean and that they can conceivably match them with a Thanksgiving sweater, I’ve decided to re-start my fitness journey. I’m even logging all of the food that has entered my pie hole. Who does that on the week known for gluttony? Someone who is certifiably insane…lol

Why am I doing this to myself? Well, I’m working on my mindset. I plan to be successful in every area of my life. Saturday I was doing my daily challenge, and the woman said something that hit me between my eyes. She said that people who are truly successful are successful in every area of their lives: body, mind and spirit. She asked, “How many truly successful people do you watch who are unhealthy?” She went onto say that healthy people workout and eat well…it’s just a matter of their day. It’s always a part of the agenda…either to work out or at least move the body.

Yesterday during my meditation/prayer session, I was really trying to dig deep…asking God what I should do. I have a million ideas about what I can do. I know what my passion is. But…I have this thing wherein I overthink everything. Yesterday, I heard very clearly, “Just try.” That’s it. Two words.

just try

I want to impart those words to you as well. Just try. What is something that you’ve wanted to try, but you haven’t? What is something that you know you’d be great at, but that you haven’t attempted out of insecurity or fear?

Let’s end 2017 on a great note…pushing fears aside. What are you going to try? Leave me a comment below!

 

 

Advertisements
Posted in random | Leave a comment

As a (wo)man thinketh…

Ladies and gentlemen, may I present to you me…a recovering serial overthinker. Can any of you relate?

I am in my head. A lot. Like 24/7. Let me tell you…that place is a cacophony of thoughts. It’s non-stop. A human thinks 50,000-70,000 thoughts a day. When those thoughts are allowed to run free like a freight train…imagine the disaster that can occur.

Until recently, that’s exactly what was going on in my head. The train whistles were blowing, cars were honking, negative thoughts were rampant. It was all that I knew. People over the years have tried to tell me to think more positively; they’ve tried to tell me to quiet my thoughts. These things sound so good…but honestly, if you don’t give someone the tools to do so, you’re basically making the noise louder.

What changed? Well, a few things. First of all, I discovered meditation. When people had mentioned that to me previously, I would laugh. “That’s not for me!” “I can’t quiet my thoughts!” “Haha…do you know me?!?!”

Well, one day I decided to try it. I downloaded an app and gave it a go. The first few days weren’t great. If I got 30 seconds of clarity, then it was a good session. I’m happy to say that I’m up to 20 minutes, unguided. I’m not saying that to pat myself on the back…but to let you know that if you can related to what I said before, YOU CAN DO IT TOO! 

It’s not too weird to have a rah-rah rally about meditation, is it?

So….do you have experience with meditation? Let me know how it helped you!

namaste

 

Posted in random | Leave a comment

Dreamers dream

A little over a year ago, I traveled to California to watch one of my best friends marry the man of her dreams. I didn’t think I would be able to go, but my boss gifted me a plane ticket. 

While I was out there, I fell in love. I met some awesome people. The weather was perfect. Something just felt right. 

Fast forward a year. I was quitting my job…without a really solid plan. I had a dream. Like when I was sleeping. That doesn’t really happen often, especially in a stressful, hopeless season. 

I had a dream that I was driving. I was stopped at a stop light. I knew I was in CA…you know how you know in your knower? I saw desert and palm trees. Kind of like this picture I snapped last year. 

I gave up on that dream…even though it was obviously a God-given dream. 

Why? Well…I’m a conservative and California is the complete opposite of nearly everything I believe in. California is expensive. I’m just starting a business. Are my excuses boring you yet? Frankly, they’re pissing me off. 

Fast forward to now. My guy is out in California. He is so happy, so excited, so alive. His happiness brought my dream to my remembrance. It’s restored my hope and dreams. 

Moral of the story? Do NOT give up on your God-given dreams. I don’t know how. I don’t know when. But I know my future zip code will be in California. There. I said it. 

Posted in random | Leave a comment

Wanna know a secret

Want to know a secret about me? I hate firsts. First dates. First day of a new job. I am very much a creature of habit…so I stick with what I know. 

This week…I get to work on my first website. Even writing that makes my mouth go dry and my palms sweat. 

I’m good at learning. You show me how to do something, and I can easily master it if I want to. I wanted to learn how to apply my makeup NOT like a clown…so I watched a tutorial and practiced. 

I wanted to learn C++ in college. I failed miserably. I just didn’t get it. The code I wrote ran in a loop and never stopped. I gave up. 


Well…this week I have to kill the inner tech quitter in me. And I’m scared. I’m scared I’m going to not get it. That I’m going to botch it. 

I’ve literally been avoiding this step for about a month. No joke. It’s not like I can die from trying…but I’ve been paralyzed by fear. 

This week is tech week. Pray for me. 

Posted in random | Leave a comment

Perspective

perspective

Life is all about your perspective. In the past I was very cynical and jaded. I’m too this, I’m not enough that. You know where that got me until a couple of months ago? In a series of jobs that I tolerated, making just enough money to barely survive and extremely unhappy in every area of my life.

A few months ago, I made a change. It was scary as hell. I broke up with my old self. I had a perspective change. I decided that I wasn’t a doormat that was to be unappreciated. Admittedly, it is a daily battle. But…I’m feeding my soul with inspiration. I’m feeding my mind with books, podcasts, webinars, blogs telling me that I already have everything I need inside of me. I’m actively changing my perspective.

This morning I was listening to Gary Vaynerchuk. He swears like a sailor and drops truth bombs that blow my mind on a daily basis. He is a year younger than I, and this morning he said something that exploded my mind a bit. He said, “I am just a kid. I haven’t even started.” (If you’re not following him and are or want to be an entrepreneur, you’re doing yourself a disservice. Follow that guy now!)

Crazy. I am 42 and I walk around like I’m inching on retirement. But…if he’s just a kid…then so am I. Perspective exploded. I have not even begun.

youth.jpg

In life, we manifest what we believe. If you think you’re always going to be fat, single, tired, broke…well that’s what you’re going to be. If you see yourself happily married, a healthy weight, thriving and wanting for nothing, then that’s what you’re going to be.

We’re being conditioned by everything that we ingest. If you watch the news too much, you will walk away afraid to leave your home, thinking that the world is falling, that the economy is going to collapse and that you need every pharmaceutical that is advertised to remove the stress that the media is forcing upon you.

You are the sum total of the five people with whom you spend the most time. If you’re happy with your life, stick with what you’re doing. If you have an inkling that there is something better out there, that you can be doing more than you are at the moment, find someone who is doing great things, making the money you want to make, living the life that you want to live, and spend time with them.

friends.jpg

You define your reality by the choices that you make on a daily basis. You are in control. You are not a victim.

What are you waiting for? Let’s do this thing!

 

Posted in random | Leave a comment

Some days, it’s easy. I get up, I put on my big girl pants and I bang out the things on my to-do list.

Other days, I get up, put on my big girl pants, get to work and hit a wall. A GIANT WALL. Think Great Wall of China wall.

Yesterday was the second type of day.

great wall of china

You see, I am building something that is so much bigger than I am. I have a purpose. I am going to take people on a journey. This journey scares the heck out of the enemy. Huh? What are you talking about Deneen? I’m glad you asked.

A long time ago, I read a book by Rick Joyner called The Final Quest. In the book, he describes an army of people, being led around in a group. There are birds herding the people, crapping on their heads. The crap numbs the people so they just keep walking around and around. This is what I see going on all around me…people numbly walking around, barely engaging in life, doing what is expected of them.

As I was just sitting down to start my work for the day, I got a phone call. I won’t go into details, but it shook me. You see…I had an expectation that as I was going through this process, that it would require hard work, but that there wouldn’t be too many road bumps. HAHAHAHA. You know what they say…you make a plan and God laughs.

Well, this phone call sent me right to bed. I literally shut down the computer and went to nap. Then, I heard a very quiet voice say to me, “Since when do things ever happen the way you plan? Do you not realize that I have so much more for you than you can imagine?”

Well, I got my butt right up out of that bed and got to work.

I had a decision to make. Choice A–I could sleep, keep my head under the covers and wait for utter doom and destruction to fall upon me or Choice B–I could get off my ass, put in a few hours and get back on track.

You face the same decisions on a daily basis. It may not be about starting a business that will turn into a movement. Maybe for you it’s calling your doctor to check out that weird spot on your arm. Maybe it’s setting a boundary around yourself to protect yourself from a toxic person. Maybe it’s polishing off your resume so that you can find a job that doesn’t steal your soul. Maybe…well….you can fill in the blank here.

Wherever you are in your journey, do yourself a favor. Do your loved ones a favor. Do me a favor. Do. Not. Quit. Do the hard things because one day, you’ll thank yourself.

do it

Posted in random | Leave a comment

Take a knee

GUWG-Kneel-2

Back when I was a kid, players took a knee when they were in a huddle, listening to their coach give directions for the game, for the next play. Players also took a knee when there was an injury on the field.

This weekend, a couple hundred NFL players took a knee.

It is your right, as an American, to take a knee for the National Anthem. Men and women fought and fight, to this day, for you to have that right. Do I agree with you doing so? HELL NO. Both of my grandfathers and my father served in the military. I have many, many friends who served or who are serving in the military. I feel like you’re spitting on my grandfathers by doing so…but it is your right.

46895107-military-pics_1200x

The question I have, though, is what are you accomplishing my taking this knee?

If y’all want to truly create change for the plight of black people in this country, you have to take a look at the inner cities. Kids in the inner city need strong male role models. After you play your game, invest some of your time and your $$$ into a program in the city to encourage kids to stay in school; invest in an after school program with qualified tutors to help bridge the education gap.

How is it that the communities have been ravaged to the point that they are?

We have to stop being so emotional about racism and attack this problem with logic.

I’m sure someone will tell me that is white privilege speaking. That’s cool…you don’t know my story, but if it makes you feel better to say such things, that’s your right. See the First Amendment of the Constitution of the US.

Here are some questions that we need answered if we are going to logically come together and solve these problems.

  • Who contols the cities?
  • Who holds the purse strings of the cities?
  • Who pads the bank accounts of so-called public servants?
  • Who has been in contol of creating the standards for our failing education system?
  • Who gives them the money to fund the substandard standards?
  • Who gave the media the contol of the narrative?
  • When did the media start controlling the narrative instead of reporting the news in an unbiased manner?
  • Who is the puppeteer and who is the puppet?

puppeteer

I am not denying that there are racist assholes out there, or that racism is not real. There are and it is. Naming racism is a start…but if we just keep crying racism and do not make changes outside of that, we’re like dogs chasing our tails.

Maybe it’s prophetic that so many NFL players took a knee this weekend. Our country is seriously injured. We all need to be on our knees praying for our country.

 

 

 

Posted in random | Leave a comment

It’s GO time!!!

My day started with a squeak. Ok…a series of squeaks. 

Let me backtrack. I have a crippling fear of rodents. I don’t know why or where it came from…but they freak me out. Last year I had a mouse situation. That little guy lived IN MY STOVE!!!!! I was literally afraid to enter my kitchen. 

My landlord set up traps. He sealed any holes between me and the outside world. He made my houseguest disappear. 

This morning, I walked into my kitchen to take my morning supplements, and I heard a squeaking. I pretended not to hear it. Then…I opened my pantry door, saw what I saw, screamed expletives and RAN OUT OF THE KITCHEN. I texted my landlord to come deal with the problem and exiled myself at a local coffee shop. 

I woke up fearful, sullen and all over mopey. Fear of an itty bitty rodent pushed me out of the house and into productivity.  Huh?

You see, I’ve been allowing my fears to keep me in my place. Today, I pushed through and made more progress in five hours of exile than I have in 6-8 weeks. Today, I decided that I need to share what I have inside me with the world. Today, I put my guts into an outline. 

This is where the rubber meets the road. This is where I put my actions where my words are. This is GO time

While I hope that mouse is now in mouse heaven with all of his little ancestors, I’m thankful for that bigger scaring me out of my house…and out of my comfort zone. You see…this is the part where I find out who I am. 

READY. SET. GOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

Posted in random | 2 Comments

The power of a smile

A million years ago, I had a friend/coworker named David. That guy was always so bloody happy…I never understood it. He was always quick with a smile, ready to listen. 

I, on the other hand, was always scowling. It wasn’t necessarily intentional. I just didn’t smile all the time. 

I didn’t have a valid reason to be unhappy. I wasn’t depressed. I just wasn’t overflowing with joy. 
As I’ve aged like a fine wine, I’ve learned the value of a smile. In the city, it disarms people…and I know, for me, when someone smiles at me, it can literally change my day. 

This morning, I almost got run over by someone while in a crosswalk. Let’s not discuss how he was on the phone and wearing an Eagles jersey!😝 On the next block, a gentleman smile and gave me a hearty good morning. 

I have a choice. Am I going to let a ride, careless driver dictate my mood, or the smiling man? I’m choosing smiles all day long. 

Now, go on and smile at someone. 

Posted in random | Leave a comment

Real Talk

Ready for some real talk? I’m on the struggle bus right now. I’m questioning every bloody thing that I do…and most decisions I’ve made in my life. 

But…I have to trust the journey I’m on. I feel kind of like the Israelites in Exodus. Moses led them out of slavery, out of captivity…but when the going got tough…those crazy cats wanted to go back to Egypt…to be enslaved…because being beaten and tortured was better than the unknown. 
I started reading Brene Brown’s Daring Greatly which, honestly, has pulled more scabs off wounds than I even knew I had…and I thought I had a good inventory of such things! Shame. Vulnerability. Vulnerability is actually strength, not weakness. What? You mean that fortress around my heart is weakness? But it’s my friend…my constant companion…sorry…but that’s what is literally going on right now between my heart and my head. 

That scripture has taken on a whole new meaning the past few days. I used to think that it meant that you fall in love with the wrong person…or it leads you in the wrong direction on occasion when you follow your intuition. 
Well…my heart wants so desperately to keep me from shame and vulnerability that it has erected a wall that would put the Great Wall of China to shame (pun semi-intended.) That wall is starting to crumble, and my heart is freaking out, dancing a frenetic dance with my brain, spewing lies that I thought I had dealt with long ago. 

You see…in this moment, I had a few choices to make. I could’ve denied this, written a cheerful blog about something fun and inspiring…or I can share my struggles with you. None of us is perfect. None of us has it all figured out. We’re all on this journey together. 

Some days we’re on a double decker bus tour seeing the most beautiful sites the eye can imagine…and some days we’re on the broken down struggle bus choking on the fumes it spews. 

My message is this: trust the journey. Trust the One who sent you on the journey. If you’re struggling, reach out to someone. Likely…there is someone in your life who can empathize. 

Have a fantastic Saturday! 

Posted in random | Leave a comment