January has been health month. Annual checkup with the doctor. Mammogram. Annual gyn exam. You know, living my best life.
We are all so programmed to make sure our physical health is in check…but how often do we check in with our mindset health? Our career health? Our mental health? Or relational health?
We’re almost through the first month of the year…and though my physical health is pretty good…this weekend will be a time to examine the harder parts of my life.
I kicked off the year journaling, meditating, doing my devotions…but life happened. I’ve been dabbling in those things but not actively taking care of me.
Why?
Well…I can give you the excuses. Busy and short staffed at the 9-5. Burning both ends of the candle with the side hustle. But that would be me lying to you and to myself.
Somewhere inside, there is this angsty little girl who believes that I have to take care of everyone else first…then accept crumbs for me. She and I have been battling since I first determined that to be loved is to sacrifice yourself for others.
I have been consistently rewarded emotionally for putting myself last. I come from a codependent family where you’re made to feel guilty for not putting the family first. I am attracted to codependent relationships where I am expected to wait and sacrifice while getting very little in return.
So much honestly for a Friday morning.
In order for me to do all of the things that I am meant to do, I have to hang out with the little girl inside of me so that we can come to terms with how my life is going to work.
What does that mean? I am going to express gratitude for where my life is and has been. I am going to examine the root of why I still, despite having worked on this before, fall into the same patterns. Obviously I’m getting an emotional payoff of some sort or I would have broken the pattern.
After that, I am going to sit down and visualize, dream, write what my life looks like without those patterns. How it feels. The emotional payoff of doing the work.
Why am I oversharing? I’ve worked with a few Mindset coaches who have given me the tools I need to get to this point. A coach isn’t a cheerleader, as Rachel Hollis likes to say. A cheerleader is a yes man. A coach calls you on your bullshit.
If you need to break patterns in your life, you need a coach…not a psychologist, not a book. I’m developing a program that can benefit you if any of this resonates with you. Shoot me a message and let’s talk!
Deneen White 