Yesterday was one of the most difficult days that I’ve had mentally in a long time. I woke up and I was just depleted of all of my energy. I felt empty and cracked and hopeless. I was standing in quicksand and sinking quickly.
Fortunately, God had other plans for me.
He drew me up from the pit of destruction, out of the miry bog, and set my feet upon a rock, making my steps secure. Psalm 40:2
I am blessed to have people in my life to whom I can turn, and who turn to me, when we are in the weeds, so to speak. I was challenged to sit down and write a clear vision of what I want for my life. So…I sat down and wrote out what I want…in business, where I want to live, what type of relationship I want, how I want my perfect day to look. I needed to do those things to bring hope and vision back into the equation.
Today is a new day. I woke up with a fire in my belly. If God isn’t allowing me to go backward, then that means He has something for me looking forward. I don’t know the how, but I do have a clear vision of what I want.
You see, I truly believe that God put these desires in my heart. The dream that I have had hasn’t changed since I was a kid. I’ve always wanted to help people…I wanted to be a teacher, a doctor, a pharmacist, a psychologist, a missionary, a pastor. All of those things have one theme…they help to educate and heal people in some way. Those seemingly different vocations are actually all pieces of a puzzle that is starting to come into clarity.
Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Psalm 37:4
Despite the fact that I spent half of yesterday weeping and scraping myself off the floor, I trusted that God was working. If I trust Him and praise Him on the good days, I have to trust and praise Him on the bad days too.
Today, I choose to relentlessly pursue the desires of my heart. I may have to release things that I love to get that which I most desire…but you know what? I’m okay with that.
Father, today I cease resistance and I submit to Your authority. I may not know the how or when, but You do.
Let’s do this thing!