Self love and acceptance

You’re so fat. You’re ugly. Oh my goodness–look at you hair! You’re too stupid to learn that.  You can never achieve that goal. You are a failure. You shouldn’t even try.

Would you say those things to your best friend? To your child? To your lover?

No?

Then why do you do that to yourself? Why are we so cruel to ourselves, while we are supportive of others?

In the past, whenever I walked past a mirror, I would avert my eyes. Literally. I hated having photos taken with friends. I can give you references. I didn’t want to document fun times with those I love because I hated the way I looked. How selfish is that?

But I digress.

One of the rules of the universe is that it is a mirror. What you have in your life is actually what you want, what you desire, what you request.

Before you roll your eyes and do the sign of the cross toward this message, let’s take it to the Bible.

 “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.: Matthew 7:7

Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.” Luke 6:38

Logic dictates that if these things are true for good things, then they must also be good for bad things, right? So, if you ask God for protection, for provision, for anything, He will give it to you in due time.

On the contrary, if you focus on being fat, being ugly, not being able, doesn’t it stand to reason that you will also be given that?

The tongue has the power of life and death,
    and those who love it will eat its fruit. Proverbs 18:21

We have to train ourselves to speak better about ourselves. I used to think that people who actually believed all of this were living in some dream world that I would never understand. At the time, I was right. I wasn’t ready to understand.

The last few months have afforded me a LOT of time with myself. It’s been a roller coaster, to say the least. I’ve loved myself. I’ve hated myself. I’ve tried to hide from myself.

You know what? My self isn’t going anyway. I’ve decided to love her, and speak good things into the universe for her, and pray in a different way.

When I pray, I ask God for specific things. When I look at myself in the mirror, I compliment my self. When I work out, I tell my self I’m doing this because I love Deneen.

Don’t worry…I am not turning into a narcissist. What I am doing is learning to love my self as God loves me, as Jesus commands me. In Matthew 22:37, Jesus tells his followers the greatest commandments:

“‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’^[a] 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. ³⁹ And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ 

Today, I encourage you. Love yourself. Be kind to yourself. Accept yourself. Are you perfect? Nah. But for me, that’s cool. I think you’re perfectly imperfect.