I rung in 2011 with a fever, nausea and an overall feeling that 2010 was more of a pisser than even I thought. As I heard the fireworks going off over the Delaware River, I started to cry, thinking, this is just how I imagined 2010 ending, but not how I wanted 2011 to begin.
I am not a big New Years Resolutions person. Like everyone else, I want to start every new year off on the right foot. Lose weight. Save money. Be happy. Then, after a week of “trying,” I’m out having a cheeseburger with fries, buying perfume that I neither want nor need and crying about something.
When my friend asked me yesterday what my resolutions were, I looked at the phone incredulously, realizing that I had made none. As I spoke to her, I did made some decisions for my life. I hesitate to call them resolutions, because I don’t want to break them by the time I hit post.
1. I have decided that I am going to start drawing some emotional boundaries. With family. With friends. With coworkers. I can’t get involved in everyone else’s stuff. It is making me emotionally sick, and frankly, it’s not my stuff to bear. I’ll listen, but I’m through with getting involved.
2. I want to encounter the Living God. Not the god that is being preached about in churches. Not the culturally relevant god that people try to fit into the box of their own disobedience. The Living, Breathing God that spoke the earth into existence; the Father who loved the world so much that He send His son Jesus to take on our sin. The Lord who agapes us so much that He gives us free will–to love Him or hate Him; to embrace Him or spit in His face.
3. I’m over moral and cultural relativism. Don’t worry. I have a blog about this one.
4. I’m weeding out the friends list…and I’m not talking about Facebook. I am willing to have a long list of acquaintances, but very few can and will be called friends. If I’m not willing to put a lot into our relationship at this time, and you’re not willing to put a lot into our relationship at this time, let’s be honest and stop calling one another friends.
Maybe the emotional scars of 2010 have created a bitter me, or perhaps they have created a wise me. Either way, I’m not willing to put up with crap anymore. It may take a few more days to wash the crap of 2010 off of me, but once it’s gone, it’s gone for good.
Happy New Year 🙂
Deneen White 