Spoken For

I’ve had some weird dreams lately.  That is really odd because, until the past few weeks, I’d rarely dreamed.

The other night, I had a dream that all of my teeth fell out.  In my dream, I was devastated.  How could I work for a dentist and be completely edentulous?

The following night, I had a dream that all of my hair fell out.  I was washing my hair and it fell out in clumps.  

My sister is convinced that I’m pregnant.  (I’m not.  There is no chance of that being the case.  None.)  

There’s also an increasing pressure about being single and childless.  I was talking with a co-worker Friday, a twenty-something.  They’ve finally gathered the courage to ask me if I have children.  When she learned that I am 33 and have no children, she gave me the look I used to give 30-somethings who I learned were single with no kids in my 20’s.  I felt old and…old.  The family wants me to be “happy” and “married” and to have some little babies to play with.  I want these things as well, but I can’t force it to happen.  

Whenever I find myself in these situations, I fall back on Mercy Me’s song “Spoken For.”  My heart is spoken for.  I just hope it’s not the guy from the gym who smells like he forgot to bathe for a week and who smokes three packs of cigarettes just before he gets on the bike.  Gross.