Treatise on love

So, this weekend, I heard for the umpteenth time, Deneen, I think that you are in love with the idea of being in love.

What does that mean?   And why is it that only people who are married say it?

I admit that one day I want to get married and have some kids.  But for now, right now, I am enjoying single life.  I like that I can fly off for a few days and not have to answer to anyone.  I like that I have the freedom to go out and stay out all night and not get into trouble for doing it.  I like that I can decide, at the last minute, to hop in my car and head to the shore for an evening and not have to find a babysitter.

Love and relationships for those over 30 are different.  The people that I hang out with who are single are not in a rush to fall in love and get married.  We are looking for companionship, but we don’t want to rush into a lifelong commitment.  We understand that the world today is different than it was when our parents got married.  Over 50% of marriages today end in divorce.  There is generally not the stigma for people over 30 who are single.  Unless you are from a small town or are active in the church.  Then they openly wonder what is wrong with you. 

So, yes, there are a couple of guys that I am interested in at the moment.  I am a woman.  And human.  But that doesn’t mean that I am in love with the idea of being in love.  It just means that I am made of flesh and blood.  It would be nice to have someone to go to dinner with once in a while; or someone to travel with.

So, please spare me the condescending remarks about being in love with being in love.  Just because I am single does not mean that I want what you have. 

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