So this morning I woke up angry…and feeling like the powerful woman I am.
Why was I angry? Well…I realized a trend in my life.
Whenever I walk in my power, there is one person…never the same person because that would be way too obvious…who takes it upon herself or himself to edit me.
Deneen…you know when you said xyz…well…yeah…this is what I think about that.
Deneen…don’t you think that was harsh?
Deneen…can you watch your language?
I have a vast vocabulary. I can write posts here that would require people to google half the words…but that’s not what I’m called to do.
Nor is it my intention to impress you with SAT words.
Nor will I write shit that makes you comfortable.
Because…well…that Deneen is on life support and I pulled the plug. There is a glimmer of her who gets revived when I edit myself to make you comfortable.
I love that little girl who wants to please people…but she and I got into some trouble along the way.
You see…while she was making sure I was safe, and you didn’t get mad at me, the core of who I am was atrophying.
Do you know what it feels like to be dying on the inside?
If you’re reading this, I suspect you do.
You go through the motions of life, smiling with a smile that never reaches your eyes.
Boring conversations that don’t challenge you in any way.
Using big words and wearing flashy watches to convince people you’ve arrived at some random destination that they should admire.
I’m not here to tell you how to live your life. You do you.
I refuse to be a part of the status quo, and I refuse to edit myself to ensure your comfort.
I’m going to fucking swear.
I’m going to turn over sacred tables that are peddling shit that defiles what I hold sacred.
And you know what?
I think you need to find YOUR voice, your true, unedited, unfiltered voice and do the fucking same.
Do the work.
If you find yourself consistently inconsistent…and you find me triggeringly endearing…then I have a treat for you coming within the next week or two!
Until next time…be well. Drop a line to let me know how YOU’RE doing.