Living a life of regret

If I could do it all over again…

If I hear that phrase one more time, I’ll vomit all over my shoes. 

I love my Oma.  She’s done nothing but love me unconditionally. 

She was a child during WWII in Germany.  She had a tough childhood.  She was an “oops” child…born ater her siblings were in their teenage years.  One or two of her brothers were killed on the Russian front, fighting for Germany.  Her father was Catholic in Nazi Germany…his refusal to deny his faith cost him promotions.

My Oma and I have a special relationship.  She confides in me more than she does the other grandchildren…I’m the oldest grandchild, and, at times, more than she does her own children. 

But, spending concentrated time with her over my past two visits, I foudn myself getting more and more frustrated.  Her favorite phrase is, “If I could do it over again, I would’ve…”  She regrets so many things.  It’s tiring.  She spends so much time reliving what she would’ve changed that she doesn’t take the time to be thankful for the blessings she has.

I’ve learned from her that I need to live a life of gratitude, of thanksgiving.  My life is less than ideal, but I have a wonderful family, some great friends.  I’ve traveled more than most people I know.  I have a relationship with the living, vibrant King of kings and Lord of lords. 

Though I left my visit with my family stressed, I am thankful because I see life through a new lens.

2 thoughts on “Living a life of regret

  1. Wow, great outlook. We all should just be thankful for what we have, and where we’ve come. Focusing can often make one bitter. May we all keep an outlook of thankfulness, no matter. And if we truly have nothing to be thankful for, look ahead to the future, knowing that there IS hope for change. THE Hope!

    Your earlier post was also interesting. It seems you are in a position that isn’t for you. It is a means to an end at the moment. I believe God created us with purpose. And what good are we if we are couped up doing something that only drains our energy? Look, maybe I am jumping to conclusions. I understand that you may well be in your desired field, but it seems as though your position and current situation is less than ideal. Trust God to place you in a position where you wake up every day looking forward to what lies ahead. Excited! And after each day, each completed project, you are energised. Much the same as your previous positions.

    May God our Loving Father use you to Mightily extend His Purpose!

    PS: Thanks for the comments re: my India post. I will keep you posted when the next post is up. 😀

  2. That first paragraph was meant to read: “focussing on the past…”

    Always happens… We re-read our posts AFTER we have posted them! 😉


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