I’ve been very punchy lately. Seriously so. I can’t seem to find a comfort zone. I can’t find that comfort in my own skin. It’s not that I’m not content where I am. But I’m not content where I am.
So today, as I was walking down Market Street, among the high rises, I asked God why I can’t seem to find peace, to be in a peaceful place. “Deneen, you’ve forgotten your first love.”
I need to worship like David did…become undignified for the Lord. I need to love like Jesus did, taking off my cloak and washing the feet of the people. I need to be who God called me to be, not who God called others to be. I need to be a fisher of men, not a pleaser of men. In short, I need to return to my first love.
How did I, again, find myself in a place where my first love is sitting in a corner gathering dust? The daily grind, the busy-ness of life, majoring in the minors.
So, I humbly ask God to forgive me of forsaking my first love.
And I thank God that He will not allow me to be comfortable, to be content when I am forsaking my first love. If the day comes when I am comfortable being anywhere outside of where God wants me, I pray that He takes me home to be with Him.