I know why the caged bird sings

5 July, 2007

I started reading The Organic God by Margaret Feinberg yesterday. I’m trying to take my time reading it, to let the words soak deep into my soul. It is one of those books that has just grabbed me by the scruff of my neck and said, “Ok, let’s get moving.” That does not accurately describe the effect that it is having on me, but I cannot think of another way to put it.

As I have been reading, something inside of me that has been laying dormant has been revived. I crave an adventure. I long to do something that challenges me on every level–physically, emotionally, spiritually, humanly. I long to engage in a mission…to do what I was created to do. I know that in doing what I’ve been created to do that the Creator will make Himself real to other people. I don’t know if this makes sense or not. There is just something that happens inside when you are doing what God created you to do. You are being stretched to the point where you think you will break, but you feel more alive than you have in your entire life.

Yesterday I almost picked up Maya Angelou’s I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings. I feel like a caged bird whose wings have been clipped. I know that I can soar, but I’m being contained in a small space in which I cannot test the span of my wings let alone spread them and fly. I don’t know if God has me in this small space or if I’ve allowed myself to be contained in the small space. I don’t know if I am a caged bird or a butterfly trying to break out of a coccoon. Two very different circumstances, but similar perspectives, if that makes sense.

Well, I have to go read a book to my niece. I love those moments when you share time with someone you love.

More to follow. I promise.

6 responses

Briggie

Jul 7, 2007

Deneen, I totally relate when you say you feel like a caged bird. I’m reminded of a scene in The Color Purple where Ceilly has finally gotten the courage to tell the family just how she feels and then Sophia speaks up and says something to the effect of, “I know what it feels like to wanna sing and can’t go nowhere”, I’ve been stuck in a cage of sorts for about 3 1/2 years now and my mind says go but my body says are you kidding. Now, as for wanting a new challenge or mission my only advice is this: 1)pray, pray, pray, pray and pray some more asking God to lead and guide you. 2) remember Jabez and the old saying be careful what you wish for because you just may get it. 3) know that God is always there for you and if God leads you to it, He will see you through it. 4) be prepared and get ready – He’s got something really BIG in store for you, I can just feel it. God Bless and take care, ^i^ love briggie

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deneenwhite

Jul 7, 2007

Thank you soooo much.

I hope that you realize what a huge part of whatever it is that God as in store for me…I’ll never forget, for the rest of my life, the butt kicking that you gave to me when noone else had the guts to do so. I will never forget how angry and relieved I was, all wrapped into one enchilada.

We’ll have to get together sometime soon to catch up. I don’t know if I’ll be able to handle the 1/8 mile commute, though 🙂

I love you…thanks for being a voice of encouragement.

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tejasfan

Jul 7, 2007

Deneen you hit my heart at the core right now. This was powerful for me to read. I can so relate.

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tejasfan

Jul 7, 2007

Deneen, it was like you looked into my heart and read my thoughts. This was such a blessing and powerful to read.

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Briggie

Jul 7, 2007

Now you’ve done it…you’ve gone and made me cry – and it’s not because I’m off the anti-depressants either. My heart is so full of joy for you and it has been such a pleasure to watch you grow from a shy little girl into a tall proud woman. I’m so happy to have you in my life, sisters in christ – cool huh, considering i’m old enough to be your mother. Isn’t God great? He is no respector of person so I guess the Jesus in us lets us be the same way. Sorry, I must sound like I’m rambling – my bad. Take care and let’s do that bible study!! love, briggie ^i^

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Margaret

Jul 8, 2007

I am so thrilled the book is a blessing and encouragement to you! Can’t wait to hear what you think when you finish!

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